Disaster++

"Kab hai holi? Holi kab hai" one of the many
unanswered questions of theHindi cinema found
its answer this year. The Holi was on 
11th March, 2009. Holi is a festival of colors
but the color was yellow this year because of
the disaster which I witnssed on that day.
Even now, when I think of this day, it reminds
me of the movie “Final Destination”. I find,
everything was planned such a way that the 
disaster was destined to occur.

As I had already put all my tee shirts for
laundry (1st indication), and was left only
with my favorite shirt to wear for going to
college. The day was just like a regular day,
suddenly from thin air popped up one of my 
roommates (2nd indication). Generally these
days I return home only around 12 in the night,
but he convinced me to come home with him a
little early (3rd indication). I thought,
every day anyways I work for long hours; hence 
there won't be any harm in going home early
at least on Holi.

I joined him and we decided to walk instead
of cycling back to home (4th indication).
Soon we reached the traffic signal next to our
apartment, and we were waiting for the signal
to turn green so that we could cross the road.
Suddenly, I saw a group of cool Desi guys 
crossing the road, on seeing them a fear ran
down from my head to toe. (Things could have been
different if I read the indications) I got a
feeling, something is going to go wrong, soon
almost everyone in the group had crossed the road
and even we got the signal to cross the road too.
Suddenly, one of the guys from the group
identified me and returned back to me to apply
color to my face.

As we had no access to Holi colors, this group
used cold cream and mixed turmeric powder and
had been applying this paste on everyone’s face
since evening. Soon later, everyone figured us
out and came rushing towards us, they didn't
even bother to look for vehicles while crossing
the road, and then the disaster struck.

I almost fainted; I still don't remember what
exactly happened after that. Only thing I
remember is, I requested my roommate for an
immediate life support system.

Few days later...

Following is the conversation between me
and my roommate Ameya (Conversation is almost
in its true form with little modification
because my intensions are not to hurt anyone’s
feeling).

Ameya:  u der
ur shirt is screwed

Jha:  what the fuck

Ameya:  its still yellow
Ya

Jha:  oh man, that was my fav shirt

Ameya:  i applied soap directly 2 it in 1st 
place so dat stain would go

Jha:  fuck, i'll have to buy a new shirt now

Ameya:  its gone, stain is prominently visible

Jha:  oh fuck

Ameya:  n u cant use it in open
its for house use only

Jha:  oh shit, I hate everyone who were 
involved in this

Ameya:  hehe

Jha:  wish they had some brains
i could have saved my shirt
that too my fav one

Ameya:  n frm its looks der is no way
u can save it

Jha:  oh my dear shirt

Ameya:  :D
aabhi roo mat

Jha:  i got a feeling that the shirt
has met the worst accidents of its life
but i thought support system may revive it

Ameya:  i think ur shirt just puked

Jha:  all in vain, it died today in 
your arms
wish i was around

Ameya:  i've kept it in laundry shute

Jha:  i wanted to look into his collars
before it died
:-(

Ameya:  its in its coffin now

Jha:  we will have to perform its funeral

Ameya:  donate it 2 A****!!

Jha:  man, may his fabric rest in peace
ha ha ha, don't joke

Ameya:  atleast he'll b happy dat he 
got new cloths
dat 2 frm u

Jha:  its like giving your dear one’s
body to a toothpaste making company so
that they can make
toothpaste out of its bone

Ameya:  wat do u think

Jha:  dude, it was my fav shirt

Ameya:  he'll use it as undergarments!!
but its good

Jha:  don't talk of him

Ameya:  u can still use it for next holi

Jha:  i am really unhappy

Ameya:  preserve it

Jha:  yaa, that is what i'll do

Ameya:  u have a new HOLI shirt frm now on
u'll use it for years 2 com

Jha:  i'll preserve his body for future

Ameya:  n den ur children will use it
as Traditional wear

Jha:  today the technology is not available,
but in future 
there will be some technology to get
it back to life

Ameya:  n 1 day it'll land up in museum

Jha:  no museum, its not an exibition item,
its my fav shirt

Ameya:  by dat time its threads will b worn out

Jha:  i cannt keep it away form myself
no, i'll laminate it

Ameya:  den u'll use it as inner waer
wear*

Jha:  i won't allow time to even touch it

Ameya:  we'll give it 2 astro
(astro is Rohit, he is doing masters
in Astronomy)
he'll come up wit sm timetravel

Jha:  nways, i am writing my next blog 
for my fav shirt

Ameya:  n repair it
1 more crap 2 read
Nahiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Jha:  fucker, you are reacting as if
i force you to read it, you read it
out of your choice

Ameya:  if i wont  den u'll feel bad
dat no 1 reads it

Jha:  but, the accident still revolves
in my mind

Ameya:  so its my pain
abe chod
do u remember
who was d real culprit 
who murdered ur shirt

Jha:  wish we could have reached the
traffic signal a min late,
they might have already crossed the road

Ameya:  ali, amin 
(two of the guys from the group)

Jha:  no, i don't want to weep spilled milk

Ameya:  simply tell dat u dont remember

Jha:  forget it, god is watching everything
their shirts will bear gods wrath

Ameya:  dats hilarious

Jha:  what wrong did my shirt do to
those ruthless guys?
it was a virgin all his life
never smoked
never touched food

Ameya:  never s***ged

Jha:  never had alcohol
W H Y?

Ameya:  never laid

Jha:  whay this happened to it?

Ameya:  fate buddy

Jha:  W H Y only him?

Ameya:  date
k
u also wanted 2 b part of it

Jha:  did got not have a better
shirt to wear?

Ameya:  ??/

Jha:  why he called him to 
heaven so early?

Ameya:  "did got not"
....wat da hell is dat

Jha:  i meant god

Ameya:  who told u its in heaven
its ur shirt
has 2 b in hell

Jha:  it has to be in heaven, 
i just saw angel shirts taking it away

Ameya:  takin him for a ride 2 hell
nothin else

Jha:  ok, enough, i am doing my work now, 
we will continue after sometime

Ameya:  wat r u upto
ping
ping
ping
ping
pong

Jha:  hey can you plz save this
conversation for me

Ameya:  chal even i m leavin ...

Jha:  on the name of my shirt?

Ameya:  will cook smhtin
k
n can u do me a favour

Jha:  what it could be?

Ameya:  in those thoughts of 
ur lovely shirt 
his last words which
he told me 2 convey 2 u

Jha:  ok, but before you do anything,
save this conversation NOW

Ameya:  k

Jha:  it must be saved with
immediate effect

Sent at 8:08 PM on Sunday

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